Conscience - too often a burden

My day was going along marvelously.  I was crocheting the morning away.  Showered and fancied myself up after lounging around for the past 4 days.  I headed to town to pick up some ingredients for tonight's dinner of Rib Steaks w/garlic smashed potatoes.  I even picked up some ingredients to try out some homemade flavored waters, since I'm terrrrrrible at drinking water!

And even on the way home, I was chuckling when I saw a lady come out of her house in her slippers and bathrobe to get the mail that was just delivered.  At TWO in the afternoon!!!!

But 5 more miles down the road, the day took a turn.
As I was cresting over a hill on a backroad, I saw the mailcar approaching.  The road was icy; I slowed... and then I saw the Springer Spaniel running, following after the mailcar.  There simply wasn't anything I could do; the timing was simply wrong in so many ways.
The dog was in the middle of my lane; the mailcar and I passed each other, but the dog kept running instead of heading for the ditch.  I repeated "please get out of the way, please get out of the way" over and over... and hit the brakes to slow, worried about sliding and colliding with the mailcar or hitting the ditch, and of course, the Springer was a concern too.  There was nowhere to go.  The Springer collided with the front of my van and ended up in the snowbank on the other side of the road.

I was stunned.  The girls witnessed the last bit of the accident after hearing my repeated prayer of 'please get out of the way."  Poor Candace gasped,.... "Mom, is it okay?"

I turned around in the next driveway and headed back up the hill to see how badly she was.  A neighbor was just coming out to retrieve his mail just delivered;  I waved him down to see if the dog was his.  She wasn't his, but he headed over to the other neighbor's.    I knew the house;  it's the house of a former student of mine.  And yes, the Springer was a family pet of his parents.

I grabbed a flannel blanket out of the van to wrap the Springer up in while waiting.  She didn't care for me to touch her; she couldn't stand, but definitely was willing to lift her head to snip at me for attempting to check her over.

The family had been out on a snowmobile and sledding in the yard.  Mom came out, repeating "oh dear, oh dear..."  and some of the rest of the family came to check out the commotion.
I'm crushed!
Within minutes, a car was brought around, the Springer was bundled up and placed in the back seat, and they were going to head to the Vet.  My former student was having difficultly keeping the Springer settled in the back; she kept wanting to sit up.  I want to believe this is a good sign.

I asked him to please keep me posted.

I've tried crocheting to take my mind off.  But truly, with each stitch of the hook, I kept re-seeing the Springer running head-on to the van.  I couldn't do anything.  But still... what an emotional situation that isn't allowing me peace.

Heavy heart this afternoon.
I hope she's okay.

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UPDATE
Just received a mssg from my former student:
"We just got back from the vet. Sounds like she is going to be okay. No broken bones or internal damage as far as the vet could tell. Normally she never goes on the road. But she circles vehicles when they come in the driveway to check them out so I'm sure she was doing that to the mailmans car after I ran up there with the snowmobile."

I may being able to cook dinner tonight after all now.
Still feeling anxious, but I know that'll go away with some time.