So, as I sit here, trying to get a grasp on everything that has been happening over the past couple of weeks, and all that needs to happen within the next two weeks, I must ask myself "Have I met Korzybski's definition?"
As I ramble on tonight, feel free to tune me out at anytime. There will be no quilting discussed, unless it comes as a by-product of attempting to bring myself back to some solid structure of sanity. The ramblings tonight serve one purpose: to get my mind structured and organized and feeling a bit more confident that things really aren't as bad as what my mind is perceiving things to be.
I have found myself sitting lately, frozen by the feeling of being overwhelmed, and unable to be productive because of these stressful feelings. I know I have a mounting pile of tasks; but I truly am feeling that the mountain is about ready to erupt.
I have had moments of accomplishments, only to find that things have been half-finished; or I've become busy with some other task and left other things sitting, left to be forgotten. ONLY to come back to those "forgotten" things minutes/hours later, and then I am right back to the overwhelmingness feelings. A spiral that is frustratingly NOT coming to an end.
So.....first, my list......WHAT must be done within the next day?
**a moment of panic, because my brain has shut down! It can't prioritize!! Ahhhhhhhhh!**
Okay----something small and simple: Must have coaches meeting at 7:45 to help Marching Band instructor plan rehearsals in August. Okay...check.
Next, teach 1st hour Web Design (students working on projects, so I should have some time to work on grading their projects). Okay...check. 2nd and 3rd hour bring Algebra and Math 8; both classes will have daily tasks that are already set and established. okay...check. Then....PREP time! Holy buckets---what to do first?!?!??!?! (((***no, no...don't panic---**)))
On a somewhat related, but not related note......much needed decision-making and communication is not being handled positively by some staff at the JH level (and even HS level). We are struggling in a few areas simply because communication hasn't been so straight-forward by the administration and/or other parties involved at the school. Summer school is right around the corner; staff have had their student-recommendations in for over a month, but today was the first that we've heard that any action is being taken. I've kind of lost track of other concerns I had in regards to commmunication (lack of communication) because I've simply gone to the mind-set "to each their own" and "fend for yourself." This 2nd attitude has quite possibly put me at the brunt of much "hallway gossip" because I think I've been sticking my nose in to some places it doesn't belong, BUT......Well......THEN COMMUNICATE WITH US ALREADY! (calm....calm....calm down.......)
And then...there's the not-so-prioritized tasks that are so remotely listed at items #29 and #30 that I wonder if I'll ever get to them........the School's website is in need of updates-----tsha! Let's find THAT time, shall we??? And who needs supplies for next school year? I must not because finding time to get some lists together via catalogs isn't even on the radar screen yet. I suppose I could also try to clone myself 5 different times, but sadly I fear that my life would get even crazier (you've all seen Multiplicity right???)
Okay.....so...where does this post leave me?
2) At least a bit more decisive regarding the Badger State Vball tournament
3) confirmed that in order to things to happen, we need the "movers and shakers" of this world.
Well folks, Watch me shake......
final note: no sympathy comments needed---really. I just needed to journal tonight and get some of my thoughts in writing. Tomorrow, I'm sure I'll come back and have some different view-points on things I shared tonight; and I may decide to delete this post altogether for fear that it could be misinterpretted in the wrong hands.....
Happy Tuesday going out to you!